Scalpels & Wholeness

Well, happy new year, fam! I know it's been a minute, but you know I'm always excited to share my random musings with you - unfiltered, slightly sleep-deprived, and always from the heart.

So... the other day, my colleagues had an intense, super real WhatsApp group conversation about work-life balance. And whew… it hit!

Much of the talk was about how surgeons, spend years chasing success, money, and reputation, often forgetting to enjoy the life they're working so hard to create. And it really got me thinking. I've always said I want some kind of balance. I love surgeries and I want to live a whole, happy life. I want to fix bones and replace joints by day, then sip mocktails or have hot chocolate while I binge-watch TV with my favourite people at night. I want a collabo. A balance. A vibe.

But here's the thing: sometimes balance feels like a myth. Sometimes, I feel like I'm juggling everything—career, family, emotions, expectations—and inevitably, something always slips. There are days I show up as a brilliant resident but a half-hearted friend. Other days, I'm the present sister, auntie, or daughter, but my academic inbox and to-do lists silently judge me. Trying to be everything all the time is crazy exhausting and, honestly, probably impossible.

The real deal is that balance means different things every day. Balance doesn't mean equal. It just needs to be intentional. Some days, I'm the warm embrace, the call you need, the sister who shows up. On other days, I disappear into theatres and ticking timelines. And you know what? That's perfectly fine! Because I've learned that balance isn't about being everything all at once. It's about showing up and honouring who you must be, one day at a time.

Yes, I want to be a fierce, accomplished orthopaedic surgeon without sacrificing the joy of life's simple pleasures. I want to book a spontaneous holiday trip without anxiously checking my bank balance. I want to leave medical conferences inspired by new surgical insights and excited about the latest lipstick shade I picked up on the way. I want to embrace vulnerability after a tough case or a long day, then unapologetically treat myself to a muffin and milkshake (even though I know that lactose might come for my life later, LOL), curled up on the couch with the people I love - or on the phone with them. I want luxury shoes, spa days and an esteemed subspecialty fellowship. Give me a hammer in one hand and daydreams of Maldives in the other. 

Residency (or life as a surgeon) doesn't mean your softness must die.

Ambition doesn't cancel out ease.

You can crave love, laughter, and adventure and still aspire to change the world.

I want both. I deserve both. We deserve both.

So, no, I don't want to choose. I hope I never have to choose between surgery and a full, blessed life—between being a strong woman and a soft one, between breaking generational barriers and getting my nails a pretty colour, between walking with purpose and strutting in heels (or cute sneakers). I want to be a brilliant surgeon and a soft soul. I want to dream big and still enjoy the little things—maybe not every day, maybe not perfectly.

Na collabo, abeg.

Had to jump on this Barbie trend because why not? LOL. #OrthoBarbie pon dis😉🥰

To anyone trying to build a life that holds both fire and flowers, I see you. Some days, we'll lean into the fire, chasing dreams, showing up, pushing forward. On other days, we'll choose rest, simple joys, and stillness—and that's just as powerful. Through it all, you are still worthy, still whole, still brilliant.

I hope you never have to choose between a fulfilling career and living a beautiful life. What matters is knowing what your version of a full, beautiful life looks like and protecting it, even as you chase your boldest, brightest dreams. I'm rooting for your version of balance, even if it looks different every day.

What does your version of balance look like? Leave a comment or share this with someone who needs to remember that they are allowed to want both a thriving career and a full, joyful life.